1.  Hire a wedding planner and find your venue
If you would like a wedding planner to help you from A to Z, this is obviously the first vendor you’ll find.  Immediately after, you’ll start looking at venue choices.  (If you are not hiring a planner for the entire process, add planner to step 2.)  Your venue is probably the biggest determining factor when deciding on a wedding date.  Plus, it sets the style and tone of your wedding, so it helps to determine what vendors you’ll need.  Venues also have preferred vendors they work with, so you have the opportunity to see who has worked well there before.

2.  Hire those who only work one wedding a day.
The photographer, videographer, officiant, entertainment and specialty transporation (like a horse carriage) usually fall within this category.  Those who only work one wedding a day book fast, so you’ll need to go ahead and place a deposit to make sure you reserve those you truly want to help with your special day.  If you have not hired a wedding planner yet, they also fall into this category.

3.  Work from the biggest budget item down.
Your top budget item will be the food and beverages.  If this is not included with your venue, you’ll need to start shopping for an outside caterer.  The next vendor will depend upon your priorities, but here’s a common order I follow:  florist, rentals (including linens), transportation (such as a limo), bakery (for your cake or other dessert choice).  The reason I do this is to help prevent overspending.  If your love florals and are willing to sacrifice your limo, this is the way to go.  If your cake is first priority, move it up on the list, etc.

Vegas was most wonderful!  I had so much fun with the hubby checking out the Strip and seeing tons of shows.  Our absolute fave was The Blue Man Group, which I HIGHLY recommend to anyone.  I had no idea it would be 3 solid of hours of laughing and being amazed.  What fun!

The thing you cannot avoid in Vegas is the huge amount of walking you must do to get anywhere.  I mean, seriously folks, these casinos are huge and if you want to explore even one of them, you’re going to walk for a while.  I had been told and I did wear comfortable shoes…most of the time.  Twice I wanted to dress up and look cute and wear the cute shoes, but I soon learned that was a VERY stupid mistake.  I would take a picture and show you, but that’s just gross, so just believe me when I tell you that I ended up with at least 4 bandages on each foot due to blisters and sores caused by my “pretty” shoes.  Never again!  I quickly learned the trick of wearing comfortable shoes til I got where I wanted to go, and quickly switching to the pretty pair once I was there.  (Yes, a medium to large purse is required for this.) 

Shoes are always a great topic though, and what do I find when I get back?  Nearly Wed has posted about some wonderful places she found in her search for the perfect wedding shoe.  I get asked all the time where to shop and I just adore the list she came up with.  Some of my faves she listed are Bluefly, J. Crew and I now love Stu. 

I found this beauty on the Bluefly site.  As Carrie Bradshaw would say, “Hello, lover.”  I bet they would hurt though…

I am a huge fan of wedding websites.  Most guests now a days love this nifty tool that keeps them up to date on the wedding plans as they progress.  I love it because it saves the bride a million phone calls asking her about details such as when is the ceremony, what hotel should people stay at, where are they registered, who are the bridesmaids, etc, etc, etc.  So, in this vein, here is my recommendation for where to go to make your wedding website.

Weddingwindow.com is a very user friendlly service that not only has great themes and an easy to use interface, it also allows the couple to blog!  What a great way to document your engagement period?  LOVE IT!  Take a look and let me know what you think.  Enjoy!

I just finished The Bride’s Guide to Diplomacy by Sharon Naylor.  (Yes, it took me that long.)  What a fabulous book!  Sharon covered many questions that I’ve received and even more that I have not.  Loved everything she had to say.  Some of the more interesting situations she addressed to me were, what to do when postponing a wedding, how to handle announcing a cancelled wedding, how to address respect for the death of a loved one but continuing the wedding plans.  Yes, I know, not happy stuff, but very good to know!  I definitely recommend this book to help with ANY sticky situation!

My next read is Eco-Chic Weddings: Simple Tips to Plan an Earth-Friendly, Socially Responsible, Affordable Green Weddingby Emily Elizabeth Anderson.  I picked this up a month or so ago at my fave store, Posy Lane, as I’d love to know more about how to green with weddings.  I happened to notice the editor of DWeddings mentioned this in her last meeting as her lastest read, so I’m guessing it’s pretty popular.  Stay tuned for hints scavaged from this gem!  All part of the service provided by Each & Every Detail.

Well now you can borrow your way to the fancy stuff!  Check out www.bagborroworsteal.com to find a little wowzer for your day.  You can borrow anything from rings, bracelets, jewelry and even some fabuloso bags for as long as you’d like.  The rental price is quite nice and you can start with a week or maybe a month and keep renting as long as you need to.  It’s first come, first serve though, so make sure to rent yours in time for wedding or other special occasion!  I would recommend renting a piece for a month ahead of time so you can make sure your fave is avaialble.

So many times the first consultation I have with a bride, alone without her fiancee or mother or any other key players, this is the first question I get.  She is so frustrated about how long it takes, how many phone calls she’s made with no progress, how many times she’s asked about decisions she’s made or has not made, how conversations with family or friends has made her so angry or hurt, she just bursts into tears sitting with me and saying how she promised she wouldn’t cry.

Ladies, it’s all right to cry!  Your wedding is probably the only moment in your life when so many hot buttons get pushed.  Think about it.  What moment in your life do you know touches all the “taboo” subjects of money, religion, family relationships (the good, the bad and the ugly) and even sex.  All of these areas are hit on in the planning process, whether you want to or not, and it gets added into the pressure cooker of being expected to plan the biggest moment of your life, on your own most of the time, and somehow manage to do it perfectly when you have never planned anything this intricate before and there is no way to practice!  It’s all trial and error.  Plus, you are expected to handle all of this while doing whatever it is you normally do, such as going to school, working full or part time, or even being a stay-at-home mom.  Who in their right mind wouldn’t break down and cry at some point? 

If there is one thing I could do for every bride, it is to let them know that they are not crazy and that they have every right to “break down” a little and if I could, I’d be there for them to give them a hug and a tissue and tell them it’s going to be ok.  Because really, it will be ok.  Weddings always tend to work themselves out, as long as you have patience and can let go of the idea of perfection.  No wedding is perfect, it does not matter whose wedding it is.  They always come extremely close, but I guarantee you there is always something that happens, whether little or large, and whether you even know about it (good vendors can hide these things), but I promise you there is no such thing as perfection.  Please have patience with yourselves and others!  You will get through it! 

Oh, and if nothing else, you can come see me for a shoulder to cry on!

I was working with one of my brides today and she said something that I thought was so perceptive.  “What woman doesn’t love flowers and books?”  Now, it was probably one of those you had to be there moments, but I loved it!  I adore Barnes & Noble and would probably spend my entire life’s earnings there if I didn’t have to eat.  What made me think this appropriate to blog about was that one my most recent acquisitions from this grand place is a book…. on flowers!  I thought I’d share for all as it is a wonderful resource, not only on different types of flowers used for weddings, but it gives great ideas based on colors, theme or by budget!  It’s called “The Knot Book of Wedding Flowers” and of course I’ve linked that to B&N.  It was written by Carley Roney, the editor of The Knot.  I have found it to be a great tool for working with my clients in describing flowers and familiarizing them with what they like/don’t like.  It’s definitely a must have on the bookshelf!

Recently, many of the couples I’ve worked with have created and published a personal website to keep friends and family in the loop about their wedding plans.  I love these sites.  They often have a history of the couple, such as their engagement story, pictures, introductions to their wedding party members, plus loads of info on the wedding itself, including pictures, website links to vendors and even the ability to request songs for the DJ or band to play at the reception!  Such fun and a great tool for getting the word out!  Have you created your own website?  If so, I’d love to hear from you as to what service you used and what you thought of it.  Either email me or just leave a comment.  Thanks in advance!

Effective September 2008, Texas counties will waive the marriage license fee (ranges from $31 - $41 cash depending on the county) IF the couple takes an 8 hour pre-marital preparation course that covers important marital skills and issues, such as conflict management and communication.  The course must be taken within 12 months prior to applying for the license.  While I’m not a fan of the state getting involved in marital manners, I think taking a class before marriage is a GREAT idea, if for no other reason that starting conversations couples may not think to have before walking down the aisle.  Go Texas!

So, what’s with all these names?  There are so many wedding planners out there, but they all come under different titles.  You might have seen wedding planner, consultant, coordinator, designer and producer, to name a few.  What’s the difference?  Well, there really isn’t a defined job description for anyone to point to, but here is my opinion. 

I chose the name “wedding planner” because of two reasons.  1st - this is the designation the two certification programs I have participated in elected to use.  They feel the word planner is an umbrella for all of the other names and I agree.  2nd - This is what I feel I do.  A planner is someone who plans out all the details of a wedding, determining all the logisitcs and coordinating those logistics, vendors and all the other details to make sure your wedding is what you want it to be.  The first program I was trained through, Dallas Wedding Planner, has given me the title of Certified Wedding Planner.  The American Association of Certified Wedding Planners has given me the title Trained Wedding Planner, as I have passed their training course, but not completed all the criteria for Certified Wedding Planner.  (Don’t worry, I should have all this sewn up by spring next year.  If you want to know more, I’d be happy to explain!  Training for wedding planners is an entirely different subject I plan on addressing for you later.)

For all the other names, want to know what they mean?  Ask the person using the title.  A friend of mine will be using the title wedding designer.  For her, this is because she will be offering floral, decor and design services.  This is what she prefers to focus on, instead of actual coordination.  I think each vendor defines these words for themselves, so make sure when you are looking at a vendor using these titles, you ask them to define those services so you know what you are getting, and when comparing, it’s all apples!