As I tend to work quite a few non-traditional weddings, I often get asked what can guys wear that’s a little different from the standard black tuxedo?  Well, first, there is no longer JUST the standard black tuxedo.  Most tux shops carry complete lines of black, pinstripe, white and even gray tuxedos.  Some of the cool new options though include a brown tuxedo, or even just tuxedo coats of navy to ivory and every color in between.  For a fun website that shows some of these options, check out www.aftersix.com.  They have some great lines of tuxedos, coats and suits that will fit any formal affiar, but have that twist of something different.

The biggest task in planning a wedding is usually finding your venue.  Not only is it the biggest item you’ll spend money on, it completely sets the tone and style for your wedding.  Thus, it takes lots of googling, viewing websites and pictures, emails and phone calls, and then takes up every weekend until you find the perfect one. 

The hardest part of this process seems to be the comparing.  Most want to just compare the venues offerings dollar-for-dollar.  Now, while I understand trying to compare venues to get a good deal, let me first say PLEASE don’t forget to recognize the special features and services each venue offers to you.  Of course price will play a role in the venues you choose, but try to remember that the venue’s worth is not just in the dollar amount you have to pay, but also how much it offers you to make your wedding vision come true.

When comparing pricing between venues, this usually means looking at what each will cost you per person.  (Not the minimum amount required, which is NOT the amount you will end up paying)  In other words, place A will cost you $X per person and place B will cost you $Y per person.  The problem is, place A and B are offering a package deal, so you have to compare what is in each of their packages.  This is where the apples and oranges come in.  Each package can be (and most likely will be) totally different.  One place may include the ceremony and reception spaces, valet parking, sound system, chairs, tables, linens, etc, and the other may not include half that stuff.  Why is it so hard you say?  Simply because venues are trying to offer you everything you want in their packages, not what you need, so that they can make the biggest bang for their buck.  They tell you it is to make it easier, which of course it is, but they don’t really give you any way to determine if their pricing is fair.  (This is of course where a wedding planner comes in very handy.)

If you’re stuck trying to juggle all of this and need to compare places based on price, the best way to handle it is to come up with what you want, not what the package offers.  For example, you want their ceremony space for a half hour, the reception space for 4 hours, no valet parking, bridal suite, champagne toast but no bar, butler passed canapes and the roast beef dinner.  Give this to the coordinator at each space and ask them to come up with a custom package for you based on this.  If you prefer to negotiate, take their package and see what items you can exchange to “customize” the package for yourself.  Do this with each venue coordinator, and you’ll get something much closer to comparing apples and apples.  This will help you narrow down what is the true price you are paying and what you really want for your wedding day.

What’s the difference between the good, the bad and the ugly when it comes to DJs?  Here are some examples:

1.  They don’t have the equipment requested.  This past week I requested a lavalier microphone for the officiant to wear during the ceremony on Saturday.  This did not make it onto the DJ’s truck, thus the minister had to use a hand held mic for the ceremony.  Not convenient when he has a bible, rings and the couple’s hand to juggle while doing this.  Especially not good if he hasn’t practiced this and the vows keep getting cut off as he moves the mic from himself to the bride or groom to quickly.  Even worse, the officiant decided to put on his own comedy routine to entertain those guests remaining seated while waiting for the receiving line to go down.  We took the microphone away.  Some people just can’t handle their microphone. :)  A good DJ will bring the equipment you asked for.  A great DJ would have double checked to make sure your request was taken care of, had a backup or had someone bring him said equipment if he didn’t have it there.

 2.  The songs you requested are not being played.  Too often an unprofessional DJ does not have the genre or the specific songs you requested, but what’s worse is he doesn’t read your song list until 2 days before the wedding.  He then calls and tells you to burn a cd of this, which would have been fine 2 months ago when you had time, but now you only have 36 hours and between picking up tuxedos and family, rehearsal, rehearsal dinner, etc, you don’t quite have the time to spend 2 hours doing this.   A good DJ will have checked the song list immediately upon receiving it and make sure he has on hand what you need.  A great DJ will either have the songs already, or will obtain them on their own (legally), with no questions, no extra fees and no hassle.

3.  He skips the details you worked into your agenda, like the blessing you asked Uncle Phil to give before serving dinner.  Even though this may be written down directly in front of the DJ, they skip it because it’s not their “usual” and they simply aren’t paying attention to the written instructions.  A good DJ will be checking the agenda all evening, making sure to not skip any of the personal details you added to the evening.  A great DJ would have double checked the agenda with you before hand, making sure to understand all the nuances of your agenda and even making suggestions on personal touches you can add to your evening.

When interviewing a DJ, ask how they keep their library current.  Ask what they’ll do if they do not have a song on your request list.  Look at their paperwork and see if it allows you to customize your evening by adding personal touches, or if it just allows you to number things in the order they are to happen.  Find out from their references if there were any “little” mistakes at their wedding, and look at them with a microscope.  While these are little mistakes, it might be something this DJ has a habit of doing and you do not want it repeated at your wedding.  All of these questions will reveal whether the DJ you are looking at is one of the good, bad or the very ugly.

And now the blog makeover.  What do you think folks?  Now that the blog looks like the rest of my website, is it better or worse? 

Thanks to everyone who competed in the contest.  The winners are:

1.  Shannon Cole with Happy Trails Carriage Service

2.  Ari Gray with Alternative Wedding Services

3.  Debi Sementelli with Lettering Art Studio

Thank you to the winners and everyone’s feedback on the site.  You all rock!  There are always a few adjustments left to be made, such as making the gallery a little faster and making the blog resemble the rest of the site, so keep an eye out for more changes.  And as always, stay tuned to the blog for more fun tidbits!

The Each & Every Detail website has been reborn with a fresh look and great new features.  I would love to hear everyone’s thoughts on it, so I’ve put together a contest to encourage it!

For the one who can correctly answer the below questions first, you’ll receive a handy $25 gift certificate to Barnes & Noble, my absolutely favorite store!  The two runners up will each receive a $5 Starbucks gift card. 

1. How many pictures of gerber daisies are on my new site, excluding the Galleries page? (These are the bright colored daisies.)
2. How long does your first consultation with me take?
3. Which service level offers monthly meetings?
4. Who is Rosemary?
5. What is the fourth item on my Anti To-Do List?

Just email your answers to wendy@eachandeverydetail.com and we’ll see who is the quickest on the draw.  Now you bloggers have some competition as I sent an email out with the contest details too.  Ready?  Set, Go!

Hold on to your hats folks, we’re going through another website revamp.  I’ll be adding lots new features like a huge FAQ page and a photo gallery.  So, for today no real blog as I’m going to focus on getting the website knocked out.  I’ll be back soon though!  Once the site is up and running, I’ll also have a contest for everyone and a prize.  Stay tuned!

I recently spoke with the new NYLO Hotel in Plano and found out a few fun things they offer.  So, if you’re looking for some summer fun you should definitely check it out!  This hotspot is open to all, not just their guests, so head on over. 

Currently, they are having a “Movies Under the Stars” event Thursday nights in July at 7.30pm.  They have a huge inflatable screen in the pool area and are showing some of their faves, such as Jaws, There’s Something About Mary and Casablanca.  Their pool area is fantabulous and has tons of couches, lounge chairs and an outside bar area to help keep cool.  I can’t wait to find time for this!

 They also have “The Loft”, which is their restaurant there.  You will find some great appetizers and even better drinks to be had, with Dj’s providing the best tunes to relax to.  Their happy hour is M-F, 5-7pm and on Saturdays from 4-6pm.  They have a Library as well, which includes pool, fun board games and a rentable Wii.  How much fun is that?

I received this ad by email a few days ago.  It just struck me as an interesting take on how to get customers in the door.  See, the wedding industry must not be too bad if everyone is trying to be like us.

A friend sent me an article a few days ago titled “10 Things the Wedding Industry Won’t Tell You” from SmartMoney.com.  She sent it to me saying oh great, here’s another article bashing the wedding industry.  I read the article and I can honestly say it infuriated me. 

Yes, there are some flat out crap people in this industry.  Yes, some of the things listed in this article do happen.  Yet, most of these stories you see here are NOT the majority of what goes on!  The wedding industry has taken many great strides over the past few years to “clean up” it’s act.  There are now so many associations and organizations with the main purpose of certifying, licensing or at least upholding their members to a code of ethics so we don’t have so many loons and greedy persons out there.  There’s someone checking on every corner of the industry, officants to planners to DJs.  We all have someone out there who is making sure we do a good job.  We are not the same people!

The issue is now that anyone looking to get married is going to see these scare tactic articles that not only give out worse case scenarios as if they are commonplace, but they offer no help in educating the consumer in how to avoid these situations.  Not only that, but they give them no resource on how to find the good vendors!  They simply want to make ratings, so they throw out these sensational stories and get everyone to believe that the big bad wedding industry is only out there to do horrible things to people.  Guess what?  That’s how the news places make their money! 

First of all, wedding vendors are not non-profit organizations.  We are here to make an honest living, just like everyone else.  If you hear about a way that someone is making money that you are not comfortable with (for example kickbacks), ask about it!  Check with both vendors to see if their stories match.  I have had vendors offer me kickbacks, but when this happens I either out right reject the offer or ask the vendor to change it into a discount for my clients.  (I can explain about this in more detail, but will need to make it another post.)

Second, there is plenty of information out there for brides to look up and see how well a vendor is doing.  Simply asking for references is a crucial task, but not the only way to find out how a vendor is rated!  Check for ratings on sites like WeddingWire.com.  Simply Google a vendor’s name to see what you find.  Check out the BBB.  

Third, the wedding industry makes it a habit to go above and beyond for their clients.  What other industry does this?  Our clients demand that their wedding day be perfect.  We are held to the highest standard.  Yet, when someone has a bad day and makes a mistake, they are lucky if it is not spread all over the papers as if it were a common error.

My advice?  Do your research!  Weddings should be treated like any other big ticket purchase in life.  Look at what you want, do your research on market pricing, evaluate your vendors and then make a decision.  Every bride that walks through my door gets told what organizations I’m a part of, what my education and experience is, that I am certified and insured and is given everything in writing.  If you can’t get the same from a vendor you are using, you didn’t do your homework and you’re not using top quality vendors.  Quality is what counts.  Wouldn’t  you rather know that your wedding is not going to become one of the worst case scenarios you see in the news?